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Thursday, September 30, 2010

Five-Fingered Dating

Over lunch today, after I amused a friend with my latest adventures in dating, he suggested I try his approach: Five-Fingered Dating.

At first I recoiled, thinking it sounded a bit like an infamous Woody Allen quote or a fraternity hazing prank. (Old connotations die hard.) Then he explained. I thought it seemed so clever, I couldn't believe he hadn't patented his approach. He assured me it worked to great success when he found his wife. Now in his mid-50s, and still happily married, he doesn't have much use for it anymore, so he was glad to share it.

Here's how it goes:

Take each of the five fingers on one hand, and assign every one an activity you think you'd like to do with your future mate: dancing, tennis, jogging, hiking, movies, antiquing, watching football, spitting watermelon seeds, spelunking, etc. Then find five people of the opposite sex with whom you can do one of those activites -- just as friends. Keep looking for more people -- again, just friends, no hanky panky -- to add to each finger. (OK, yeah, I realize the metaphor seems a little weird, but just hang with me.)

If you keep focusing on finding fun people with whom you can do the things you enjoy, eventually you'll discover some people can fit on multiple fingers. Keep it clean, focus on friendship, and see where it goes. In the worst case, you'll be doing things you enjoy anyway.

I thought this was clever and intriguing. So, I have picked my five activities that I would like to do with MFH (my future husband -- as any student of CSS knows, we Smith girls love to use initials):
  1. Trying new restaurants -- especially random, hidden ethnic eateries.
  2. Tasting wine (hmm, could this present challenges in the "keeping it PG" department?)
  3. Watching thought-provoking movies worthy of discussion (does not include blast 'em blockbusters)
  4. Reading and discussing interesting books
  5. Hiking, jogging and tennis (too broad? I could not pick just one)
 What do you think? Should I try it?


Mandy said...

Lynsley, I think this is a *great* idea!! (And it's a lot better than the five-finger dating I imagined from the title which involved shoplifting together on your first date!)

Marjorie said...

Absolutely! I want to try it too.

Dee Stephens said...

awesome idea! I sort had similar goals when dating. On the top of my list is someone who liked to be active and enjoy weekend trips and just 'exploring'. I totally find my guy. People are somewhat surprised how he tends to be more hyper than me!

J.Bedenbaugh said...

pretty cool idea, but i would add one ... find something you both love that the other can't stand ... you are guaranteed to get some much needed time apart (either girl time, guy time or quiet time)